“Love is stronger than death even though it can’t stop death from happening. But no matter how hard death tries, it can’t separate people from love. It can’t take away our memories either. In the end, life is stronger than death.” – Unknown
The relationships we have in our lives are crucial to our happiness. As humans, we need these meaningful connections to feel connected and happy and find more joy in life when we share it with the people we love. But there are times when death forcefully separates our loved ones from us. Coping with this loss can be one of the most painful things we have to do.
When we lose someone we love, it destroys our peace and distorts our whole universe where nothing seems right. For a person who is grieving the death of a loved one, it seems like there is no future that exists and all they want is to go back to the past wanting nothing more than being further away from the present moment and facing reality. For a grieving person, all they will see for a long time is vanished possibilities- of all the things their loved one wouldn’t experience and all things they can’t share with their loved one. For a grieving person, it’s difficult to find peace and acceptance. They are always disturbed by questions like ‘why’ and ‘how’ to which they can’t find any answers.
But what we have to realize is that our loved one are never gone, they have just changed and moved on to a different place. They will always be there, around you, with you, in your heart. You have to realize that what you are trying to cope with is not loss but change. Typically, we tend to resist change as much as we can, preferring to stay in our current state of safety and comfort because change is hard or everyone. But life itself is a constant change. That’s nature. And sometimes it can be tough to handle, like the loss of someone who was dear to us, and sometimes change can be what we wanted, like getting a new house. But the fact remains- life will continue to change, those around us change and we have to change too. Your lost loved one may not be a part of the material world anymore, but there are a part of you and your world. They are still there with you but not in the same way as before.
Your loved one is in everything you have learned from them- in the things they did, in their children and more importantly in your heart and your memories. Knowing that your loved one is not gone but rather their state is changed into something you don’t understand makes it easier for you to accept their loss, face reality and find peace again. This will make you finally accept that your loved one has moved on and you need to do the same.
When you lose someone you love, everything changes. This is not the change you wanted or even anticipated and you may wonder if you’ll ever be the same and go back to being your old self. But after such a traumatic change, you only have one way to cope and that is by changing yourself too. Nothing can bring your loved one back and nothing can undo what happened in your life. Without accepting the change, you make it harder on yourself to move forward and find peace. You may think that you will never find peace after your loss and you may feel like your whole world has crashed down but it hasn’t. It’s just different. Know that your loved one hasn’t gone; they too are just different now. Eventually you’ll see how this will help you find peace again and accept the loss of your loved one.